I am not a copywriter or indeed a marketing guru but I have learnt a trick or two from the web so while I might not be the most qualified person to dissect someone marketing strategy I think in this case I'm going to have a go.
This is a genuine site seoconsulting.com a nice domain name the owners also have seoexpert again a very nice domain name and if you watching I will happily take the first off your hands for a reasonable fee 
Start the consultation
The problems
- No contact details
- No explanation of what they do
- That guaranteed word in there
- Out of date footer
- lame code
Apart from the fact this is a one page site sitting in a table with 2 paragraphs worth of text it surprising how badly designed it could be.
"SEO Consulting has a proven track record of successfully and consistently
putting their clients at the top of organic search engine results. Since
1999 we have been developing winning SEO strategies for our clients. Our
proven formulas and processes will get your website top rankings and increased
traffic ... GUARANTEED." SEOConsulting.com
Why does this sound like a con? a rewording of this paragraph would really help SEO Consulting to many Indian SEO sweat shops using similar language and we all know there is no such thing as guaranteed rankings in any engine unless you own it.
Make contacting you easy
One of the crucial things I think is easy contact, on this site for example my contact page is accessible on every page and I'm liberal with my email address, its t.nash@venture-skills.co.uk if you want to get in touch with me. However our dear friends at SEOConsulting.com have a different approach.
SEO is a formula. If done properly it is a formula for the success of your website. Give us a call... we can help. It's that simple.
Urgh you forgot the phone number 
but if anyone is interested their email should you wish to contact them is seo@seoexpert.com now arn't I kind.
Things to avoid your consultant saying
What you don't want is to hear a consultant saying...
How come someone with a PR4 give advice on SEO? SEO Flash - user comment
If you wondering why this is such a bad comment for this particular guy to make
But more importantly if you still are confused you might like to try my article Lies, damn lies, and page rank statistics. For more suggestions on what your SEO Consultant should not be saying try my How to spot an SEO snake oil seller.
How not to write that page
Their you go I think I have found the worst SEO sales page ever what do you think? can it get worse then this?
Update - You know if I was a law firm I would probably do some background checking this could prove to be a bit of a problem for some companies connected to SEOConsulting lets hope they can stop any bad press. Also if you are Masry & Vititoe and are reading this you probably should be very upset with your marketing company, a moral to the rest of us always block your clients project viewing areas from search engines..
Hi Tim,
SEOConsulting.com hardly qualifies as a site for sure. Curious individuals might pull them up with the site command and see how the duplicate their clients content. Including using the client’s names and keywords in page titles. I did not go out of my way to investigate this last time, but the main page has but 2 IBL’s both from themselves (one is their stylesheet). So the IBLs to support the PR 4 are clearly not to the main page, they are supported sitewide, with their clients content.
So an SEO company with no clear line of contact, no idea what a canonical redirect is, and duplication of client’s content for self promotion. Who would come to your blog, with quality content, spam, and then speak of your PR4 on the “very new blog”.
Very sad indeed.
Melanie
Not really much of a salespage either but hey, I think its alarming how many of these pages I come across and the way I find them is nearly always through spam comments left on my blogs. I can see why SEO gets a bad reputation when this is people first impression.
Tim
OK - I found the 40 points from the snake oil SEOs amusing.
Now what can you do for me?
My ranking in Google is not impressive.
I have fiddled with Adwords at great expense to no avail and do not want to hear of Adwords or the Yahoo equivalent.
Regards
Bob
Well I can’t do much for you as I’m not taking on private clients
But organic SEO or on page SEO is the first and fundemental aspect if the foundations of the building are not sound the house will fall down. PPC is a lot like a drug it is great in small doses, but used to often it gets expensive and addictive and if not monitored closely can mask bigger problems
This is a sad case indeed. hmmmm, one must wonder if it wasn’t simply a domain reseller who came across a sweet domain, and is waiting for someone to relieve him of this burdensome domain for a burdensome amount of cash. easy enough to do. copy and paste someone else’s content, put some sort of contact details on there, albeit only a phone number, and see if someone takes the bait.
to many cooks in the kitchen when it comes to SEO if you ask me. Everyone thinks they are an expert… wikipedia is the greatest SEO expert in my opinion.
haha, great response to his comment!
You ever see the movie Erin Brockovich staring Julia Roberts? Well the law firm Erin works for is Masry & Vititoe. They really exist and have done very well.
The company you are reffering to better watch out. The law firm could have a hey day with them. Just the thought of a person coming after me like Erin Brockovich would make me re-write the guarantee.
Ok so I see the Masery Vitto Reference now. Disregard parts of my previous comment
@Jansie - The gent who owns this domain appears to own a few more, some very nice domain names and mainly SEO based. But and this is a useful tip for domainers if you want to make some extra money on the domain it really pays to get it ranking for one or two terms. Think of it like doing up a house before a sale.
@RobDogg - Not sure if that was a jab at me or my victim but there is a lot of people who call themselves SEOs who use to call themselves web designers before they realised they sucked at that as well!
@Jim - Anybody who spends more then a few minutes on my blog will get the hint this is not a place to spam
or make numptie comments without just a tiny bit of fun being had at their expense I’m glad you enjoyed it.
@Chris - My movie trivia is not that good so I didn’t note the connection, it was just a thought that since a search on seoconsulting.com brings up a lot of their pages (it looks like an old redesign) they may have grounds to be upset. I think I would be!
Tim great analysis as always. Some great advice on how not to sell anything with your page
I took the liberty of sphinning this little jewel. http://sphinn.com/story/28982
You at it again Tim? Ha Ha - I know of at least one other company who considers this seo.
That reminds me - time for ANOTHER email to ask them to remove my client’s mirror site from the serps…. in fact I’ll point them here too.
@Martin thanks for the Sphinn
@Shaun I just can’t help myself its almost like a compulsion but to be fair any one who comes and spams here is fair game
or spams you, or Martin or Mike or well indeed anyone I happen to know!
Speaking a worse SEO pages. I think I have one that beats yours.
Do you know that you can get #1 on Google on any keyword you want for free? Not to mention guaranteed …
www[dot]1on40[dot]com
Sorry for the dots but I don’t want to give them incoming links
ah yes oddly enough I am aware of this company and their loving practices
I found there StumbleUpon campaign very um entertaining. But for some minor legal reason I might not use them in future however I do suggest people check out their offer if they want a laugh I personally was going to select credit cards, loans, viagra, seo as my keywords 
see how they do lol
Nice spot, I better go and check my sites in line, which it’s probably not.
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